18 December, 2009

A pitch.

Filed under: — Matt P @ 8:39 pm

At shortly after 6PM CST on a typical Thursday, one thousand men named Ted from all across the continental US are vaporized in bursts of energy. This energy shoots into the atmosphere, coalesces over the Midwest, and shoots down into the city of St. Louis.

The bolt of furious energy strikes Carl Mills in the chest. Mills, a recently downsized reporter, crumples under the blow, but soon staggers to his feet. In the next half hour, he realizes his head is full of the buzzing minds of the disintegrated men and that he has gained the knowledge, the abilities, and the combined strength of one thousand men named Ted!

Mills wanders the lonely highways of America righting wrongs, bringing closure to the lives cut short and trapped in his head, and seeking out the secret behind the Mysterious Origins of MegaTed!

6 Responses to “A pitch.”

  1. Tyler Says:
    December 19th, 2009 at 2:39 pm

    Not to nit-pick, but he would technically be a KiloTed.

    Also, why are disasters usually limited to the continental U.S.? I feel Alaska and Hawaii have been getting a free ride disaster-wise all these years; they should suffer with the rest of us.

  2. shawn Says:
    December 19th, 2009 at 8:24 pm

    alaska has palin.

  3. Anonymous Says:
    December 20th, 2009 at 2:12 am

    I like it!

    Question: Why just 1000 Teds? Seems like there are a lot more… Maybe that’s the number of Teds in Hawaii?

  4. Matt P Says:
    December 21st, 2009 at 10:33 am

    Tyler: D’oh! Yeah, being off by three orders of magnitude is a bit of a problem. I’ll have to either make it a million Teds or change the victims’ name to Graham.

    Why are disasters limited to the continental US? You try making Toronto stand in for Hawaii. ;-) Although Shawn does provide an interesting counterexample, and there was the time the Bradys got tiki-idoled in Hawaii.

    Thanks, Anon! The question of why just 1000 would be the big mystery driving season 1. Although all the Teds (or Grahams) in Hawaii does have potential.

  5. Pete Says:
    December 21st, 2009 at 3:13 pm

    You youngsters amaze me sometimes.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1964_Alaska_earthquake

  6. Matt P Says:
    December 21st, 2009 at 3:26 pm

    I, for one, had no idea. Looks like God hates Alaska. Too bad MegaTed (or KiloGraham) wasn’t there to help out.

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